On the first recount of Christmas, my country gave to me ... a disputed presidency.

On the second recount of Christmas, my country gave to me ... two campaign spins, and a disputed presidency.

On the third recount of Christmas my country gave to me ... three pregnant chads, two campaign spins, and a disputed presidency.

On the fourth recount of Christmas my country gave to me ... four contested ballots, three pregnant chads, two campaign spins, and a disputed presidency.

On the fifth recount of Christmas my country gave to me ... five... court fil-ings! -- Four contested ballots, three pregnant chads, two campaign spins, and a disputed presidency.

On the sixth recount of Christmas my country gave to me... six disenfranchised voters, five... court fil-ings! Four contested ballots, three pregnant chads, two campaign spins, and a disputed presidency.

On the seventh recount of Christmas my country gave to me... seven politicians babbling, six disenfranchised voters, five... court fil-ings! Four contested ballots, three pregnant chads, two campaign spins, and a disputed presidency.

On the eighth recount of Christmas my country gave to me... eight spokesmen whining, seven politicians babbling, six disenfranchised voters, five... court fil-ings! Four contested ballots, three pregnant chads, two campaign spins, and a disputed presidency.

On the ninth recount of Christmas my country gave to me... nine reporters guessing, eight spokesmen whining, seven politicians babbling, six disenfranchised voters, five... court fil-ings! Four contested ballots, three pregnant chads, two campaign spins, and a disputed presidency.

On the tenth recount of Christmas my country gave to me... ten legal rulings, nine reporters guessing, eight spokesmen whining, seven politicians babbling, six disenfranchised voters, five... court fil-ings! Four contested ballots, three pregnant chads, two campaign spins, and a disputed presidency.

On the eleventh recount of Christmas my country gave to me... eleven judges judging, ten legal rulings, nine reporters guessing, eight spokesmen whining, seven politicians babbling, six disenfranchised voters, five... court fil-ings! Four contested ballots, three pregnant chads, two campaign spins, and a disputed presidency.

On the twelfth recount of Christmas my country gave to me... twelve lawyers lying, eleven judges judging, ten legal rulings, nine reporters guessing, eight spokesmen whining, seven politicians babbling, six disenfranchised voters, five... court fil-ings! Four contested ballots, three pregnant chads, two campaign spins... and... a disputed presidency!