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SmithMemo

Smith & Wesson

Memo

RE: STATUS REPORT FROM THE COLONIES

FR: Ed Shultz, CEO, Smith & Wesson

TO: Gregory Hutchings, Chairman, Tomkins, PLC; London, England

CC: {The Winning Team}: {Charlton Heston, Sarah Brady, Orrin Hatch, Bill Clinton, Wayne LaPierre, Janet Reno, James Jay Baker, Dianne Feinstein, Kayne Robinson, Charles Schumer, Sandy Froman, Al Gore, Marion Hammer, Tony Blair}

CC: {Tomkins Board}: {I.A. Duncan, R.N. Marchant, A.J. Reading, D.J. Snowdon, R.M. Holland, A.E. Wambold, C.C. Gates}; Other IPs.

Product acceptance of the new Citizen Special smart gun is higher than imagined.

NRA had to oppose the earlier models because their natives were on the warpath again. But they're easy to pacify with a few trinkets and magic tricks from a celeb like Heston, and they forget pretty quick. The new model is so reliable and simple, it's hard to resist, and anyway most NRA members would jump off a cliff if "He" told them to. Members are calling NRA at 800-672-3888 and raving about the concept (and in their postage paid envelopes too). One gun group even worked up an ad for us (SEE ATTACHED).

It takes a lot to get the attention of big time players like Wayne with $20,000-a-month salaries, $15,000-a-month "expense accounts", perks, benefits, retirement, and so forth.

We took a cue from Bill Ruger's rehab from traitor to hero… Or should I say sellout to buyout? Our million-dollar "donation" to the National Firearms Museum, like Bill's, went a long way. (And thanks to the Winning Team, pretty soon that's where NRA members will have to go to see the old "dumb guns"). Agreeing to buy a Heston Silver Bullet for each gun didn't hurt either. Honor is cheap these days, but it isn't free yet. By the way, expect some off-book transfers, and we have a new PR firm.

The way things are going it won't be long before we make the "Colony" thing official again. I can't wait for people to start calling me "Sir Ed" rather than "Mr. Ed". God Save The Queen!

Your Loyal Subject,

Ed Shultz

Smith & Wesson

"Don't pull the trigger unless you see the Silver Bullet"

© 2000 Smartacus. May be republished only in entirety for non-commercial use.

Smartacus@KeepAndBearArms.com.

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