British Prime Minister's Apology
by Angel Shamaya
Director, KeepAndBearArms.com
Reprint permissions explained below.

British Prime Minister Tony Blair "demanded an apology" for the "anti British sentiments" in Mel Gibson's movie, "The Patriot".

Here are some apologies to Mr. Blair, though perhaps not in the form he can sip tea over.

1) Mr. Blair, I'm sorry you're uncomfortable with the fact that our ancestors defeated your ancestors and booted them out of our country. (I'm sorry they didn't have the foresight to force the rest of the "lords" and "nobles" to leave, too.) I'm not sorry they DID it, just sorry you're too soft to deal with historical reality. I'm also sorry you're having trouble coping with the few minor diversions from historical accuracy given the fact that those historical diversions bear significance to the current political climate in the country that rescued your country from not one, but two wars. No, your ancestors probably didn't burn a churchful of people as they sought to subjugate yet another in a long list of nations, but our government DID burn a churchful of people, just recently, and the American people needed to be reminded of that. I'm sorry you're having a tough time dealing with the fact that our society doesn't revolve around yours any longer. I'm sure you will work it out, ol boy.

2) Mr. Blair, I'm sorry you as a nation are so shortsighted and unintelligent that you disarmed your lawful, peaceable citizens. And I'm sorry your inner city violence continues to escalate as a result of setting up a nationwide criminal safety zone. (Quite frankly, on that one, I believe YOU owe your citizens an apology.) Destroying a $20,000 antique firearm that a citizen could use to rescue you the next time you--in your self-imposed WEAKNESS--get invaded makes you the laughing stock of the free world. We are laughing at you and all of your fancy "lords" and other ego-inflated slave drivers who are now sitting ducks for any old country to invade you. We are also pulling for the brothers and sisters who didn't turn in their guns to whip every tyrant in your land in a UK revolution that is long overdue. I'm sorry if that offends your timid sensibility, too. Perhaps you can take solace in the fact that, as a result of the cruel, life-threatening disarmament laws you've forced onto your nation, your moral and social decay will get worse before it gets better, so eventually you won't have time to worry about the movies Americans are flocking in droves to see again and again.

3) Mr. Blair, I'm sorry your citizens, er, uh SUBJECTS turned their guns in. I'm sorry for the people who are being victimized and have no means to defend their own lives after being robbed of the right to self-defense by your cowardly "leaders" and misguided royal fools. I'm sorry for the women who get raped and murdered and beaten and brutalized in your ignorant little serfdom, and I'm sorry for their families that must heal the wounds inflicted by your government-empowered criminals. And I'm sorry your citizenry at large was blind enough to have allowed it to happen in the first place. I'm sorry they bought the cow dung you and your kind of money-bloated "upper class" shovel.

4) Mr. Blair, I am really sorry your socialist depravity has oozed so low as to imprison a man for defending his own life and property against thugs. I'm sorry your country is blighted with such poor "leadership" that you allowed that man to go to prison, and I'm sorry, really sorry, for all the wimps who stood by and watched him get carted off and did nothing. I'm also deeply filled with sorrow that a fair number of the moronic sub-citizens in your country actually thought it was good to see that man go to prison--for shooting a repeat criminal your emasculated "police forces" cannot or will not apprehend. I'm sorry your "subjects" are so blind, ignorant, and incapable of rational thought that they took the self-defense devices your citizens could be using to defend their own lives against your well-fed thugs, and I'm sorry happy idiots in your land champion the rights of career criminals above the right to life and property of your lawful people. I feel really sorry for you on that one. Don't think much about these pesky little "rights" all we yanks keep yapping about, do you, lad?

5) Last and most of all, I am sorry your country's pathetic (as in pathos-producing), rationale-impoverished ideologies regarding FREEDOM have crept into our country and taken a foothold. I'm sorry for the people who will probably have to pay with their lives to return our nation to the freedom our ancestors killed your ancestors to claim. I'm sorry your experiment in socialism has failed to produce the freedom human beings deserve and own from birth in every cell in their bodies and every fiber of their souls, and I'm sorry we may very well have to take extreme measures here to stop that nasty little disease before we look as ridiculous as you do. Perhaps you will find comfort in the fact that socialism hasn't worked anywhere, ever--not for any length of time--so you're among a long list of losers. Misery does love company, so you might want to look to your history books to find out where you're headed as a society now that you've disarmed your lawful subjects--to see who's company you keep. Start with Hitler and Stalin, then work your way over to Pol Pot and Mao Tse-Tung.  Great running buddies you've got there, ol chap.

I would like to close, as well, by offering a sincere Thank You, Mr. Blair. Thank you for showing us so clearly that gun control doesn't work to stop crime, and that gun "bans" work even less. Thank you for showing us what dangerous, citizen-choking results come from an unchecked spread of the disease called socialism. Thank you for showing us where we could end up if we allow ourselves to drop down about 50 more notches on the political-evolution ladder. Finally, in having disarmed the good people in your nation, thank you ever so much for giving us front row seats to watch the descent of your society into the chaos you brought about because you as a body of "leaders" were stupid enough to listen to history-ignorant morons as if their opinion actually meant something. Bravo, my good fellow. Cheers.